This week, the boys discover that the only thing Hogan Knows is failure. Mike realizes he missed out on all the hot space camp action. Michael defends us from the worst scum of the universe. We turn rumors into terrible reality and reimagine the Alaskan sex scene. It’s our best yet.
Highlights include:
  • Galaxy Defenders [2:40]
  • Space Camp Orgy [10:38]
  • Pastamania Runs Wild [14:26]
  • Rumor Has It [36:30]
  • Flamin' Hot Fashionista [44:45]
  • Santa, The Ultimate Arbiter of Justice [51:10]
  • Sled Doggy Style [58:50]
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February 9, 2018

TILP 58: Crawmom Prime

This week, the boys welcome a special guest to help us fight off merciless hordes of European crayfish. Mike ponders the price of anonymity, Michael licks Doritos dust off his fingies like a trash bear, and Curtis explains how to smuggle a pizza into a movie theater. It’s our best yet.
Highlights include:
  • Clone armies and Old Bay [5:05]
  • Illuminati Oscars invite [16:30]
  • #brands and trash bears [27:40]
  • One Dollar Daydreams [43:00]
  • Ham babies and pizza spies. [55:15]
  • Robo problems. [72:00]
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February 1, 2018

TILP 57: A Gull’s Porpoise

This week, the boys explore the unrealistic beauty standards of the world’s dromedaries. Michael finally reveals some young Howard content and Mike wonders: what if big beans?
Highlights include:
  • High time for fry time. [1:45]
  • Supervillains and Humanity Stars. [8:15]
  • @WeRateCamels [18:30]
  • Two ends of the animal love spectrum. [26:30]
  • What’s. On. Asia! [37:40]
  • HUGE BEANS? [45:22]
  • Newsflash: Florida is weird! [56:15]
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This week, the boys remind you to see a doctor if you have a purple dinosaur lasting longer than four hours. Michael fruitlessly attempts to prove a conspiracy theory wrong. Mike cuts through the crap. We wax nostalgic for the only camping experience worth having.
  • Dino bones [0:35]
  • Johnny Appleripper [7:04]
  • There's always money in the Mattress Firm [21:31]
  • MMOMG [27:21]
  • Valet Horseplay [37:45]
  • King of the wild buffet [45:50]
  • Raised with the blade [53:00]
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January 18, 2018

TILP 55: Bourbon and Gravy

This week, the boys dive headfirst into mail crimes and welcome a new ruler to the throne. Michael serves us up a hot mug of the worst drinks of all time, Mike eats from the trash, and we learn the magical art of cleaning up.
Highlights include:
  • Amazon crimes
  • Mail crimes
  • Drink crimes
  • Pizza crimes
  • It’s mostly crimes.
  • Yassss queen.
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January 11, 2018

TILP 54: Dildo Daddins

First off…we’re very sorry. This week, Mike jumps in a freezer and waits for death. Michael introduces the worst possible dildo experience of all time. It’s our worst episode yet, complete with a Marvel Studios-style post-credits scene. Enjoy?
Highlights include:
  • You can’t outdeal the Devil. [1:45]
  • Damn you, Zach Braff. [4:00]
  • Iguana PSA [7:25]
  • Freeze me, beat me, kill me. [14:40]
  • Become one with your toots. [21:10]
  • Put some pep in your butt. [30:00]
  • Testicular explosion disorder [40:00]
  • The Ballad of Newman [45:00]
  • Pump, pump, pump it up. [47:10]
  • The literal worst FML of all time. [55:10]
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This week, we are back and ready to roll into the new year. Mike and Michael make excuses for their laziness. Mike sees dead people. Michael gets high on catnip. We go for a little dip in Silicon Valley poop-water.
Highlights include:
  • Ooh, piece of candy [7:35]
  • Sometimes Swedish dudes just hypnotize me [11:33]
  • Pandacists are not welcome here [22:51]
  • Merry Catmas [27:24]
  • River of Giardia [35:01]
  • Don't beat me again Daddy [51:03]
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This week, it's our ONE YEAR anniversary, and we look a gift-frog in the mouth. Mike uncovers the hidden truth about aliens and tries to cover the unhidden truth about your cat's butthole. Michael asks not what zombie Jesus can do for you, but what you can do for zombie Jesus. We go deep into the story of one man's very horrible drunken mistake.
Highlights include:
  • Luketose Intolerance [3:22]
  • Blink UFO [9:49]
  • R2-DFruit [20:18]
  • Fightin' 'Round the Girls [28:30]
  • Lord Zombo Christ [37:30]
  • Class Up That Cathole [46:55]
  • Bronze Dildo Pogo Stick [54:18]
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This week, we find out what Jesus was hiding in that holiest of holes. Mike warns of the dangers of both confined spaces and horny ghosts. Michael reveals TILP's newest sponsors and Mike shares our possible new theme song. We treat you all to the dulcet tones of The Michaels Ocean.
Highlights include:
  • This is My House [01:20]
  • Mr. Dumb, Bad Robot [03:30]
  • Badonkadonk Jesus [11:35]
  • Binge Mode [23:15]
  • Pirates of the Caribbean Queen [31:45]
  • Sponsored Content [35:55]
  • Ghost 2: Erotic Boogaloo [41:28]
  • Secret Japanese Game Show [52:06]
  • Come At Us Billy Ocean [58:16]
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December 7, 2017

TILP 50: Avalanche of Love

This week, we unleash an avalanche of pure sexual energy that explodes in a prism of mouth machines. Michael delivers Grim Truths about the Hunger. Mike once again reveals the limits of Christian science education. We learn some hard truths about all of Rudolph’s lady pals.
Highlights include:
  • Cush suits up. [3:00]
  • Well, it’s erotica time. [11:45]
  • Flower autopsies. [41:00]
  • Sorry, Reindeer Games. [47:15]
  • Absolute panda-monium. [55:55]
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